Let´s Skip This Chapter...

For the past several years now, I've been traveling the world. It has been the most healing and right (literal) move I could have made following a period of deep grief. I went through a death -- a true death of a life I loved, one shared with a partner I truly adored. I was so heartbroken, scared, and sad, even as I took steps to rebuild and reset. I just couldn't see a life separate from the one who I -- in my vows, mind, and heart -- was one with. But (sh)it happened. And when it did, I needed to make a decision. What next?

Among my biggest fears (there were MANY at the time) was that I would become a stereotype-- a bitter divorcee, or worse, a sad sack that just sat around crying. The kind of person you pass by and mutter under your breath: "Wow, she really let herself go." Some even add this utterance with raised brows, making the toxic, tone-deaf judgment arc complete. This, my friend, I could not stand. So... traveling the world was the order of the day. 

Throughout the last few years -- everything I own fitting in my trusty little single backpack -- I have been so blessed to have seen so many amazing places, which brings us to today’s adventure: Colmar, France. Did you know it was among the three little French villages in Alsace that inspired Belle’s village in Beauty and the Beast?! I did -- which is perhaps why I had to FIGHT the urge to skip (not walk, nor run, SKIP) through the streets belting out: BONJOUR! (times about 12)... and waving to the Baker (with his tray, yes) with a huge goofy grin on my face. 

As I headed down the cobblestones (making a marked, conservative effort to NOT skip), through the lanes filled with aromas of fresh goodness (the same old bread and rolls to sell, my a$$!) and passing by pastel-colored thatched-roof homes that basically sang sweetness and sparkled like magic, I felt like I had stepped into a fairytale... okay, semi-skipped into one. After taking more pictures than I would like to admit, humming "Belle" more times than I will ever actually admit, and sampling "the same old bread and rolls" that were anything but ordinary to me -- I closed my eyes, lifted my face to the sky, and thanked the universe for carrying me through those most fearful days. 

As I breathed it all in, pinching myself just once more that I had made it to this place I had dreamt of so long: I had to laugh at the realization: I really have let myself go. And go. And go... 

Standing in the middle of Colmar, feeling like a character in a storybook, thousands of miles away from home -- and universes away from the person I was -- I would be lying if I did not admit I still miss my old life -- and what I wouldn’t have given to just have stayed happy and tucked away on my little island in my partnered cocoon with the one I loved dearly and thought would be my forever, albeit only the version of him I knew. 

But additional chapters were introduced -- twists to the plot taking my romance novel into a genre entirely unauthorized! (Oh the horror) -- and now, in contrast to this fairytale place, my story is far from Disney ... but it is mine, and it sure as hell has been interesting, and moving~