The suffocating heat slaps me in the face as I step from the frigid autumn cold into yet another airport, my hair a mess and my sunglasses held together by a band of duct tape across the bridge. Ever the fashionista.
I’ve been at this for five years now, with everything I own crammed into one backpack. To be fair, the backpack probably weighs as much as I do, but that’s beside the point. After half a decade, I’ve gotten used to living like a human turtle, my entire life strapped to my back as I wander from one place to the next, still stubbornly taking the long way home.
The Blue Mountains in Australia were one of the first places that made me question my sanity. I hiked alone for hours, the cliffs and eucalyptus trees stretching out endlessly before me. There’s something about those mountains that made me feel gloriously insignificant, like the universe was giving me a gentle reminder that I´m really just a speck of dust on this planet. I did some intense self-soothing and had long conversations with "God" out there in that remote Aussie terrain. There may or may not be a wedding ring at the bottom of one of those canyons. The irony of it being swallowed up in the vast wildness of that unruly landscape wasn’t lost on me.
Sicily was another highlight. I spent days wandering the narrow streets of a village where the Wi-Fi was more myth than reality and the seafood came straight from the boat to patrons´ plates. I sat at a tiny cafĂ©, watching locals debate what I assume was the most important news of the day, and pretended I wasn’t the most obvious tourist there. My lack of Italian didn’t stop me from nodding along like I knew what was going on when they brought me into the rousing back-and-forth, signature Sicilian spice talk. Honestly, I think I convinced myself I’d learned more Italian than I had after the second limoncello.
And then, of course, there was that summer in Southern Turkey, where I spent at least a good week wondering if goats had it all figured out. They just roam the streets without a care, the locals watching them like it’s peak entertainment. I stayed in a town so small that I’m pretty sure I became the main event by day three. I’d go for long runs, no real destination in mind, just trying to take in the quiet, which eventually gave way to conversations with myself. Don’t judge—goats aren’t exactly great conversationalists.
And the tiny island where cows outnumbered people? That was one for the books. It was like I’d wandered into some kind of whimsical painting where everything was serene and somehow made sense. The hills were so green they almost looked fake, and I found myself waking up each morning to the soft clang of cowbells outside my window. This place had magic, and I spent most of my time marveling at the sheer absurdity of it all. How did I get here?
And then there’s Slovenia’s Triglav. The hike that nearly broke me. It was cold, it was steep, and I may or may not have questioned all of my life choices en route. But once I stood there, alongside my beast of a Slovenian guide, overlooking that lofty scene, even with my teeth chattering and my legs aching, there was something surreal about it. The view stretched for miles, and for a split second, I thought, “Okay, maybe this is why people do this.” Then I remembered the climb down -- far more terrifying than the ascent. Life has been this way, too, funnily.
But for all the beauty and wonder, solo travel isn’t all mountaintop moments. There are days where I want to throw my backpack off a cliff and days where I wonder why I ever thought setting out all on my own was a good idea. But then there are also days where I’m standing on a beach at sunrise -- or watching the sunset while sipping wine at a sidewalk cafe on a cobblestone square in a country that is nothing short of chef´s kiss -- that make it all make sense, or make me not care that it doesn´t (to anyone but me maybe)?
Five years now on the road, and I’m still going. There have been more places than I can count, more moments that I couldn’t capture even if I tried. My journey has been as winding as the trails I’ve traveled, and I’m still taking the long way home, wherever that may be.
So here I am, sitting in yet another airport, waiting for yet another flight. I’ve seen a lot, done a lot, and carried way too much on my back—both literally and figuratively. And on this story goes...